My father had always talked of the treasure, of the map, of the secrets. It's too bad he never got around to finding the map. I did though. Turns out it was underneath us the whole time. My grandfather said he had passed the map down to my father, but died before he could give any clue to where or what it was. It was in the house. The rugs and carpets were an old style called Gabbeh, tribal Persian rugs. Several of the clues used for reading the map were known to me for my father spoke of them often.

With graceful movements
Like serene water flowing
A boot to the head

A zombie infection was spreading over Portland, Oregon, but was cut short by an accidental discovery of a cure for zombies. Several zombies had shambled out of a coffee shop and across the street into a coffee shop. Inside were two teenage boys who were watching the zombies. When they noticed they had been spotted by the zombies, they looked for a means of escape. To hold them off, one of the boys, Matt, threw a scalding hot coffee drink that contained 6 shots of espresso at one of the zombies. The zombie stopped for a moment, but resumed shambling forward, but faster.

On the beaches of the Sea of Cortez the sun is shimmering on the waters, the sand is warm on my toes. I finally got a Mexico beach rental house. I got several other heroes to cover for me so I could take this vacation that I've needed for months. Once I finally got the Blazing Skull Gang behind bars, I could finally take a break. Ahh... the sea breeze, the sea gulls song, relaxing with a cold fruity beverage, eating a nice plate of fish made in the fully equipped kitchen, but, of course, I still feel like I should be back home fighting crime...

What in the... something is coming out of the water! It's... a giant reptile monster attacking the beaches and heading inland! Well, I'd best stop it from destroying this nice house so I can get beck to my vacation!

David Morgan-Mar was found dead in his home today. The cause of death seems to be some kind of stab would to his chest, ruining a perfectly good Calvin and Hobbes t-shirt. The killer is yet unknown and no weapon has been recovered yet. Forensic investigators speculate that he was killed at his doorway when answering the door to find the killer outside. Many fans are distraught because he was killed just before revealing a heavy plot twist in his comics: Which character was going to be killed off.

At the Park West Art Gallery I saw many wonders and sights, colors, shapes and and scenes. I found many paintings that had something in common: A woman in a red flower dress, a checker board by a beautiful vase of flowers, another woman in a large purple hat adorned with flowers, a house of wonder lit bright as if my magical light with a garden of flowers and fountains all around, a cart filled with a myriad of flowers of white, orange, yellow, and pink. Different sights and scenes, different flowers and hues, different styles and shades different paints and painters, all unified as art.

A new army weapon has been revealed and implemented in the Middle East. The weapon, Spitting Llama Paratroopers, is designed to drop in seemingly harmless animals who can withstand the heat and harsh conditions on the Middle East into enemy territory. The trained llamas can recognize certain specific targets and use bio-engineered saliva glands to expel toxic chemicals upon enemies, causing temporary blindness and skin rashes and itching, causing discomfort. Then, trained soldiers can follow in with an assault on the enemy while they have a lower effectiveness in combat.

If you have a heavy accent and are planning on learning a new language, losing the accent just might help people understand you better, even if you have perfect grammar already. Here is why:

What you are trying to say:

Hello, I will be your chef instructor for today. This lesson is about the proper preparation of a chocolate fondue fountain. First, make sure you have proper access to a power source for the fountain. Then, take the chocolate you want to use and melt it in the microwave. Do not melt it too long, or it will burn. Turn on the fondue fountain and then carefully pour in the melted chocolate like so. For a beautiful display, if possible, place the fountain in the center of the foods that are to be used in the fountain, for example here I have strawberries, orange slices, apples, and even celery. You should instruct your guests not to dip in something they have have bitten into back into the fountain.

What people hear if your accent is too heavy:

Hellu, I veell be-a yuoor cheff instrooctur fur tudey. Thees lessun is ebooot zee pruper prepereshun ooff a chuculete-a fundooe-a fuoonteeen. Furst, meke-a soore-a yuoo hefe-a pruper eccess tu a pooer suoorce-a fur zee fuoonteeen. Zeen, teke-a zee chuculete-a yuoo vunt tu use-a und melt it in zee meecrooefe-a. Du nut melt it tuu lung, oor it veell boorn. Toorn oon zee fundooe-a fuoonteeen und zeen cereffoolly puoor in zee melted chuculete-a leeke-a su. Fur a beootiffool deespley, iff pusseeble-a, plece-a zee fuoonteeen in zee center ooff zee fuuds thet ere-a tu be-a used in zee fuoonteeen, fur ixemple-a here-a I hefe-a strevberreees, oorunge-a sleeces, epples, und ifee celery. Yuoo shuoold instrooct yuoor gooests nut tu deep in sumetheeng zeey hefe-a hefe-a beettee intu beck intu zee fuoonteeen.

If you accent is heavy, do yourself a favor and enroll in some language lessons. Executive Language Training offer many options, such as English language training if English is your second language, German language training, and even Cantonese language training.

Sources indicate that the state of the union is as follow: Yup, still there.
When asked, authorities responded that the union is not planning on going anywhere.
Those residing in the union agree that the union has not moved.
Some are trying to move the union, but found they needed a bigger uHaul.